Saya mau bersyukur lagi hehehe. Tidak ada habis-habisnya kasih setia Tuhan. Saya pokoknya mau bersyukur atas anugrah Tuhan yang tak terhingga, anugrahNya bagi semua manusia baik yang sudah percaya maupun belum percaya. Saya orang yang banyak menerima truth tetapi sedikit mengetahui grace (or mengalami). The life that I am living mirrored what I know...much judging and less mercy. Jesus is full of grace and truth...thus truth and grace must be in balance.
Tahun ini tahun yang penuh kesukaran, tapi juga berkat dan rekonsiliasi bagi saya. Tahun ini saya ke singapura tiga kali dan ke new zealand sekali. I've never traveled that much in a year in my whole life. Extremely need the break. I don't know why on earth I'd allow myself to go through much unnecessary stress which I am still recovering. I feel very stupid. I covet your prayers, bro and sis. O Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, have mercy on me, have mercy on me...
I wasn't too sure whether I must leave NZ after my graduation but God did reveal that it was for good to make a move from the land of long white clouds and He also gave me peace to come to this little Asian country located in semenanjung melaka. I had spoken in front of the church in Palmy that I might still be around for another year, but God's ways are not my ways, and I must, and I shall follow His direction. I am grateful to know that my brother belongs to a good church. I was even welcomed and befriended there.
There are a lot of temptations to "serve", taking a role at church but I know my turn is not yet come. This is still a period of rest and recovery for me. I even haven't come to a decision as to which church should I belong, though I already have in mind the options. The weirdest thing happened...as the Christmas time approaching, God somehow put in my heart that I should pray for strength to share the message (the gift, the good news) to someone at least one...lest the season past. It wasn't felt like a burden but it was rather compelling. So, I was given the opportunity to be part of a choir, but it was not the thing I supposed to do. Then, IEC team served at Changi Prison Chapel, there I was moved to mix and mingle with the church visitors. I was grateful for L whom sit next to me...had a chance to accompany her. I was excited yet struggling with sincerity. I don't want to try to "convert" my new friend because no man can and I might not do it out of love. Then, I started wondering about what should I say...God gave me strength to pray with her. I really do hope that she'll come back to that little church and gave her life to Jesus. Ahh, it reminds me of SLC paraparaumu mall evangelism. God had strengthened me in much ways for I was timid, afraid, and not sincere.
Satu hal yang Tuhan bereskan dalam hidup gue yaitu hubungan gue dengan ortu...terutama juga kekhawatiran papa mengenai anak-anaknya yang suddenly semuanya menjadi kristen. Masalah pegang hio. Tapi aku sudah di encouraged kalau sudah ada peace memegang, harus konsisten. Yah...I felt much much peace about this matter. Bokap juga jadi lebih percaya sama pilihan-pilihan kita. Ahh, si papi yang lucu, keren dan gendut, juga baik, pemaaf dan bijaksana... I love you Daddy!!! Terima kasih kau sudah begitu pengertian. Saya salut, papi teh orangnya perduli dengan keluarganya, pintar berbisnis, pemaaf, generous...I am so proud of you!
Lord, I am so overwhelmed with my sins...I am no saint, Lord! I have been very proud of myself, my achievements and doubted you. You have given much...I have sacrificed a little. Have mercy, have mercy, have mercy on Lilis.
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